Butt Wipe Addict

Chay is a butt wipe addict. He loves to chew on them. All in their chemical infused glory.

My children have oral satisfactory problems. Ray was addicted to the bink. Now that she's three, she chews her nails.

Chay, on the other hand, wanted nothing to do with the bink. He loved his bottle, which I've professed to before. But early in his life, he didn't really seem interested in anything olfactory.

However, he does have a love of butt wipes. I can't keep them out of his mouth. I watch him like, well, a mother, yet he finds them any way he can: clean, used, or just abandoned. He hides them to save them for later. He sucks on them like they are a drug.

I try to watch him (really I do!)., but not only does he know how to open the most complicated box of wipes, he also has a 3 year old sister who feeds his addiction. We have had many talks with them, but I think she feels sympathy since we so rudely stole her bink away.

Forget the Star, She's Going to Be Alton Brown!

Ray loves to cook. She loves to watch me cook. She loves to help me cook. She even loves to watch cooking shows.

Tonight we were watching Alton Brown. He had cheese. And, suddenly Ray channeled Homer Simpson.

"MMMMM. Cheeeeeessse."

She didn't appreciate being called Homer for the rest of the night. I guess she didn't get the reference.

A Star Is Born

Every month Ray's teachers choose a child in their class to highlight. They ask the parents to fill out a form providing little tidbits of information that help everyone get to know the highlighted child better and decorate a bulletin board with pictures of said child. For the month of February, Ray is the lucky one.

We sat down to fill in her information sheet and had an enlightening conversation.

Me (reading the questions on the sheet): What is my favorite color?
Ray: Red. (She's right. MY favorite color is red.)
Me: OK. Let me rephrase that. What is your favorite color?
Ray: Purple.
Me: What do you want to be when you grow up.
Ray: Uhm. Uhm. Uhm. A star.
Me: A star?
Ray: Mhmmm.
Me (writing her answer down): What is your favorite thing to do?
Ray: I like to fly in the sky.
Me: Oh, because you are going to be a star?
Ray: Yeah. I will fly in the sky with the sun and the clouds.
Me (writing that one down as well): What is one surprising thing about you that no one knows?
Ray: I'm bright.

Oh, baby, that you are.

He Speaks!

Chay is 18 months old and has entered a whole new phase in his young life. He communicates! Well, he's been talking slightly since New Year's Eve, but I am just now sharing this information. Over New Years weekend, he started spewing new words left and right. He still isn't a huge talker, but we'll take whatever we can get.

And what, you ask, was his first word?

Lights (pronouced "ights").

Isn't the first word supposed to be "mama" or "dada" or some such little kid word? No, his was lights. I guess he really liked the Christmas displays.

Please Say Prayers for Collin Bowen

There is a soldier in Texas who desperately needs your prayers. His name is Collin Bowen. Regardless of whether you support the war, please support this soldier and his family. You can read his story at the family's caringbridge blog, here, and get a quick run down, here.

I grew up in a small town called Marion, Indiana. My parents were good friends with Collin's parents, so I was frequently subjected to torture by their three kids (I mean that in the nicest of ways, but come on, I'm an only child not used to brothers). I am the same age as Justin, Collin's younger brother. Most of my memories are of Justin, but I do remember being teased many times by Collin for being Justin's "girlfriend" when we were little. And, man, he was relentless.

Justin and I were close friends from elementary school through college, but we have lost touch through the years. I do think about him every once and awhile and had been wondering how he was doing. I am heartbroken that I am in touch with him again only because of this tragedy.

God bless you, Collin, and thank you for your service to our country!

Edited to add: Please be patient with me. I want to keep this post up top for a couple of days. I will start back with my wit and sarcasm soon, I promise!

I Need Sleep. And Lots of Water.

We are home, and I am tired. I didn't go to bed before 5 am the last two nights.

I danced.

I did not eat much (except for some kick ass green beans which I will post on the other blog. Oh, and a steak cooked by my homey, Drunka).

I met lots of new people. All of whom were very cool, funny, and just generally great people. I hope to stay friends with many of them. (Talkin' to you Jennie, Garrett, Anthony, Maritza, and Dave!)

I laughed. A lot. In fact, I am still laughing.

I drank more than a 35 year old mother of two should. But it felt good to come out of retirement for awhile. Even though I feel like crap right now.

Ray has three new boyfriends, listed below in order of preference:

1. Garrett


2. Drunka


3. Dave.

Chay has many new girlfriends. He has no preference list. He loves them all equally -- Melo D, Ms. Marion, Jennie.

E realized he can't hang with the cool kids anymore. He spent Saturday praying to the Toilet Goddess.

E also is the best hubby in the world because he stayed home with the Mini Me's so that I could hit the bars.

I really really miss my friends already.

C Ya Later Alligator!

Off to Fort Lauderdale for some beach/pool/bbq/partyin' time!

For Better or For Worse

I Just Found $105 in My Potholders!

Another quirky thing about Grandma is that she likes to hide money in your Christmas gifts. You can pretty much count on getting $250 every Christmas (I know, generous right?). For the men, it is usually in socks or pajama bottoms. For the women, your guess is as good as mine. Often times, though, some of that money gets lost because she can't remember where she hid it. Everyone in the family has been hit one way or another, but the money always shows up at some point, which is always a great treat when you find a $20 bill in your pajama bottoms in June.

This year I was the one that was hit. I was "shorted" $100 this year and was kind of excited to find it one day in the future. Well, tonight was the night! I just pulled out my new potholder glove, put it on my hand and, low and behold, I found a $100 bill! Then, much to my surprise, I found a $5 bill in another potholder glove!

Woo Hoo!

Melo D

Welcome 2 FL Melo D and Drunka! Glad 2 hav u here. C u in less thn 48 hrs!

Funny story:

I went to Philly with Melo D once and stayed at her Uncle's house. We got to sleep together on the pull-out couch (she's oh so cuddly, not). When crawling into bed, I pointed out that I need to sleep on the side of the bed that is farthest from the window. She casually asked why but didn't think too much about it.

"Because of the vampires," was my reply.

She looked at me a little funny then turned off the lights.

A few minutes later, she giggled and said, "You do know that vampires don't exist, right?"

I love her because she doesn't think I'm crazy.